2/29/2004

I need to move out. But my weekend was very nice. After a very stressful week in the world of magazine, I drove on up to Omaha. I really needed it. First, me and Brian went to Red Robin. (I celebrate the entire menu.) We had a waiter who shaved his eyebrows off. And we also had a couple of bevies. Then we rented The Chapelle Show Season 1 and American Splendor from Blockbuster. The Chapelle Show had a pretty hilarious booger skit that I sorta loved.

Oh Saturday.. me and Brian hit the shops like there was no tomorrow. First we went to Borsheim's, this fantastic jewelry store, second only to Tiffany's. Don let me try on the most gorgeous rings and also told us that his son was in a local band named
"Ass Backwards." This coming from an old man wearing a Mr. Rogers haircut and a tan felt blazer. Then we visited Pottery Barn. We got Brian a silver candle holder deal for his sofa table, a picture for his kitchen, and some frames we are going to prop up on shelves.

Oh yeah, and we got him something that I think is real neat. Brian HATES it.
But I made him buy it. It's a glass dispenser to hold his dish soap.
Now doesn't that scream "class":


By night's end, we had decorated our brains out and ordered that new Pizza Hut Four For All pie. It was pretty awes with a glass of milk. I fell hard asleep, otherwise I'd tell you how American Splendor was.

Today, Sunday, me and Brian just laid around as it rained outside. And then I drove the long ride home, never using cruise control and never having the windshield wipers on anything but full blast.

2/28/2004

Man, tonight me and Brian went out to the clubs.
Don't I look pretty?

2/26/2004

Rachel's job is in Paris? Meredith chooses gay gay Ian? Man, the tube is really letting me down. Good God, I have never worked so much in a stinking week. Tomorrow I am taking me and my sick car to Omaha to see the boy I have a crush on.

Things to note:
-I am 13.86 $ richer because I filed a claim in the case of the Compact Disc Minimum Advertised Price Antitrst Litigation. God, I just saw it in a Rolling Stone and it took me like 2 minutes to sign up. Sha-bang, check from the Kansas Attorney General.
-I just bought the Lost Prophets, AFI, and Blideside CDs.
-I have a sudden urge to visit California. Don't know, just never been there before.

Well that's about all I got for now, crap bag.

2/25/2004

Ok. It's official. I am obsessed with ringtones. Last night, me and sister Laura and boyfriend Robert Shin had a hilarious time browsing those tones. God, and I downloaded and paid for two: Sex and the City theme song and (drumroll, please....)
The Facts of Life theme song. It's so catchy..

2/24/2004

Alright, alright. I know. I haven't written because I'm busier than Sheryl Knight in a doughnut store. Just kidding Sheryl. (Does she read this?) Moving on.. this weekend was not too eventful, unless you count the frequent sobbing episodes on my behalf. Brian came in. We enjoyed some adult beverages in Lawrence on Friday, I played a board game called, "Pass Out", and ate a nasty/new Lawrence restaurant called Pepperjacks which resulted in a stomach pain the equivalent of swallowing a vacuum cleaner. Oh, but back up.. On Friday we went to Cozumels. I got a meal that restored my faith in the place, not to mention a hefty sampling tower of house margaritas. All I did the rest of the weekend was cry or yawn. I really want to be closer to Brian, not to mention, move out of Nottingham Place.

So, today. Today I had that blessed yearly trip to the girl doctor. And I decided, what the heck, I'll use my own insurance for once. So, I'm traveling up the elevator (with numerous amounts of people). I am the lone soul that has pushed the button to stop at floor three, my destination. As fate would have it, the other 75 people were going to floor four and definitley not my stop. So all of us are coasting up in this elevator, and I'm shakin' like a Parkinson's patient. Wait, that was mean. But I'm shaking. I hate these visits. So, the door opens, only for me, and I swear to God, directly in front of me and all of the elevator, was the largest and longest desk, backing up to a long red wall with the hugest and goldest lettering saying, "KANSAS CITY WOMEN'S GYNOCOLOGICAL CLINIC". When that elevator door openend, it was like the opening credits to a movie. That title page. The sign was that damn big. And I mean you take one step out of that elevator and you run into the desk. And everyone in that elevator had a freaking perfect view of where I would be spending the next half and hour. Great.

So I won't go into the nastiness, but all I'll say is that I was laying there in those awkward stirrups, naked and spread eagle, when the old nurse sat down on her stool, rubbed her gloves together and proclaimed, "Alright!! Let's have a look at your goodies!"

Wow. Did I forget to mention that I got into work today at 6:45am. That's illegal. I caught myself looking outside and I was thinking to myself, "Man, looks like there's a doozy of a story coming." No. Wait. It's just that the sun hasn't risen yet. I'm retarded.

2/20/2004

Um.. can someone help me?
I just did a faceplant into my Primedia sundae.

2/19/2004

Yesterday was sister Laura's birthday. "(screaming on the phone) I've just done everything an 18 year old can do!!!" So me, mom and her headed to Elephant Bar where I had the mighty tasty "Tai High Salad". And so began our night. I say this, because Clay Aiken was our waiter. Every dinner choice was "awesome!" All of our drink choices were "super!" Even our appetizer was "outstanding!" He looked like this:

And then to top off the celebration. Laura got the Clay Aiken CD and I got a Tai High blast of salad-shooting diarrhea. We blasted, If I was invincible from the CD player.
I think it's funny and like to call him "Gay Aiken".
Nonetheless, as his album covers says, Clay Aiken truly is....the measure of a man.

Weird. I just got off the phone with an ad client. Ray from Canada.
Here's what the Ray-meister had to say:
"Jennifer...I had a crush on a Jennifer once. I was in love with her. I've been waiting 13 years for her. All of my passwords are named "Jennifer". You're not her are you? Is your last name Hannah? No? Just do me a favor and next time you call here for me, please say you are Jennifer Hall."
And then I asked him if he had my contact information.
And he said no, all he had was my great name.

2/18/2004

Just bend the pieces til they fit.
Like they were made for it.
But, they weren't meant for this.
No, they weren't meant for this.
-Dashboard Confessional

BRIAN LIKES BULL TESTICLES IN HIS MOUTH.
Just kidding, folks. He just called me from a cabin in Lincoln, NE.
He's on an overnight sales meeting and they ate at this restaurant that served balls.

2/17/2004

GOD. I just totally let out the hugest and most awful smelling toot in my cube.
And who should come wheeling around the corner?
That jittery little trashman custodian, ready to empty out my trash can.
Jenny said maybe he'll think it was just the trash.
I said paper doesn't ever smell that bad.

2/16/2004

Well hello there. I had a splendid weekend in neBRAska. Valentines day slash night ended up being all that and a bag of chips. After Brian got back from shopping, we hopped in our most awes transportation and went to Nebraska furniture mart. Brian ended up purchasing a three-cushioned khaki-suede sofa, an cherry (almost black) dark wood end table, coffee table, and behind-the-sofa table from Luanne, a lady whose eyes both looked opposite ways when she was talking to you. Oh man, they (the new furniture, and NOT Luanne's eyes) are handsome and make me want to live there permanently and instantly.

So we get home and with the help of Grayland (neighbor guy), all three mega heavy boxes are upstairs. Now, at this point, Brian feels the need to do PMUSA work, which is cool with me, cause I'm freakin' ready to tear open these boxes and get to assembling. And so I do. And I mean there was so much styrofoam and boxing everywhere, it looked like we lived in a cardboard apartment. But when I get all the 336,937 pieces out, I find that the 'ol coffee table and sofa table are pretty dinged up in the corners. I was mad. All that I could put up was the end table and those stupid furniture mart people are bringing the new and not wrecked pieces on next Thursday. Me and Brian were really miffed. I've decided I'll post the final pics of that whole deal when it's all set up. Which will be April 15th, when the couch decides to get there.

So, after all that granola, we dined at the automatic 90-minute wait Upstream Brewery Restaurant. I had a spicy shrimp and sausage noodle deal, which was like eating a number one, first place, super-A+ cool thing. Then we even got the special Valentines day desert they were featuring. Awww, how cute.

Then we drove home again and went into separate rooms to write our V-Day cards. Brian said I couldn't come out until he came to get me. So he did, and I walked out into the family room with my eyes closed. He handed me a glass of wine, I heard Buckethead playing in the background, he put his hairy arms around me and I opened my eyes to see that heart-shaped candles were everywhere, lighting up a dark room. He got me a dozen roses, two cards, a HUGE bridal magazine, a gift certif to The Afternoon, and the only one I didn't own, season 2 of Sex & the City. He loved the shirts I got him and I think even more, the Simpson's computer game I gave him. And ladies, he even cried when he read my card. Oh how I love him.

Now comes the most best part of this entry. THE MANTLE. I decorated Brian's mantle this weekend. It is the thing that I am most proudest of in life. Warning, what you are about to see is not from the pages of Pottery Barn, but more like from the pages of my interior decorating portfolio. MAN I RULE.

For this mantle, I stayed an extra couple of hours in Omaha. I wanted to hang out with it.

The only other thing we did this weekend was hang out with married neighbors Grayland and Audrey. Grayland looks like Channel 9 Meteorologist Brian Busby, while Audrey does not. Grayland is a talker. I think in seven minutes we found out about a resident that tans by the apartment pool topless, a gay couple that used to make out by across the balcony from him, the schedule of the hooker girl that lives/works below him, and where the nearest decent strip club is...because "the Hooter girls ain't cuttin' it."
Thanks Grayland.

2/14/2004

"in the rain, sing a song, in our head...
so secret life, in your eyes, it's alright...
so be surprised, by the lullabies, that keep us in line tonight."
-the appleseed cast.

Happy Valentines Day.
Brian surprised me last night with a dozen red roses all done up in a vase.
*smile*
He's out um, shopping right now. We had egg McScott's and watched TLC, because Brian thought there would be something good on my favorite channel for Valentines Day. Actually, Brian says, "Valentimes Day." Honestly. Last night we watched "Saving Silverman." Please do yourself a favor and get to know this movie. So, when he gets back, hopefully with some Crane Coffee, we are gonna go shopping at Nebraska Furniture Mart to buy a sofa and some very necessary end tables. (Right now, yes, he still has upside down cardboard boxes with lamps on them.) And I think we'll buy a mirror for above the mantle and a few rugs.

Oh, last night we went to Buca DiBeppo's for some din din. Midway through...I spot a really long hair. In my Chicken Parm. So, as much as I thought the enlarged picture of Frank Sinatra with a red and green Italian boa border was sweet, I pretty much think I'll never ever eat there again. Then me and Brian went to Barnes & Noble for some reading material. Brian bought some Guitar magazines plus a book about the most important topics to discuss with your gal before you pop the question.
All night we kept cracking up about "hairtalian food" and being "hairlarious"....

So right now I'm going through this guitar mag and downloading my brains out.
Trying to find some new bands.
I think I'm gonna go put on my I love New York shirt.

2/13/2004

Greetings. Today is my day all alone in Omaha. Brian is at work and I get to explore this blessed town. I woke up pretty early, and ate the breakfast of my life: Alloutte and a few wheat thins. It's what dreams are made of. So then, I tried to do the number one thing I've wanted to do since Brian moved here: clean these nasty brown, drippy-looking stains off of Brian's shower. So, I hitched my PJ's up and went in the tub with Comet and Spic and Span. Yeah, well nothing took it off. Shit. Story of the Year was on MTV 2, so that was a cool start to the day. But then I got dressed and headed off in the Taurus. My first stop was Crane's Coffe. This place I think is special to Omaha. So I indulged. It was glorious. Now, I headed to Westlake Mall. Now, those of you who know me, know that I hate driving like I hate drinking orange juice. So, I'm driving down Dodge street, which is like 647 lanes wide. God, I was freaking out. Here I am, stupid Kansas driver. But I made it. Went to my favorite store and then realized two things:

1.) This place doesn't have a Gap. Wait, make that any major clothing store.
2.) Omaha malls must make it a requirement to have miles of card tables and glass cases for the selling and trading of old Baseball and Football cards. I mean there was barely any room to walk in between the stores because there were so many mullet, NASCAR, farmer-men drooling over these collector card tables. This is a new thing for me.

So I just about had a heart attack trying to maneuver through traffic and back home. I was even going to go to this other mall, but dang it, I got on the wrong road. So I'm so frustrated and feeling lonely, and I'm now going to Best Buy. Finally, I make it over the hill, and there it is.. Best Buy... and..like glowing gift from God, another mall. Thank you. To make a short story longer, I went and did some good shopping here.
And I saw more trading card tables. Christ.

So before Brian gets back, which I can't wait for, I'm going to try to go work out at his apartment facility. Eww.
PS. I'm wearing my new and free Primedia Business 2 Business T-shirt. This equals gay.

2/12/2004

Melissa, if you get a cat, this is what I will do to it:

God, that sounded so evil. I love it. (Court, no offense.)

2/11/2004

Ok, I just got off the phone with a client, checking on ad materials. Why, when talking to these clients, does my mouth become legally retarded and I speak choice phrases like, "No Heather, you're right on the money!" I literally can't believe myself right now.

"And I'm quite aware, we're dying.."
-Blink 182

Man, this computer being broken thing is really cramping my style. Anyhow, I'll fill you in on yesterday. Work basically filled my day, as usual. Although there were two highlights. First off, I had a lengthy e-mail chat with a new client named, "Tran Tran". First name. Last name. Nice move. Secondly, my "5 Things to be Happy About" day calendar listed "pueblos" as something that should, I guess, lift my spirits as a reason for living. Whatever, stupid Judy. My day ended with a serious trip to Town Center for some Valentines Day shopping and okay, some shopping for me. But trying on clothes is now depressing, so I marched right on out of there. Tonight I will get my eyebrows waxed off and then pack for Omaha!! Now, back to the media of Pri.

2/09/2004

So I seriously think this weekend was the best one of my life since I moved back into the house. Brian came at like 7:30pm on Friday night. I cleaned like a maniac. The bathroom, the floor.. you could eat off of them. Then after I hugged his brains out, we went in the Nebraska mini to Kioto's. It's this Japanese Steak house where they cook it right in front of you, you eat way too much food, your chef makes your fried rice into a penis (complete with sesame rice pubes and spicy mustard sauce man juice), you meet drunk-on-Saki weirdo adults who tell you you're the perfect couple (and that they only have the babysitter for another hour), you catch shrimp in your mouth, and then to complete the night you get the most worst and powerful diarrhea ever to enter a toilet.

Then we proceeded to Lawrence to hang out with our pals Liz and Montie, Jarod, Thaun (my Asian boyfriend "no but seriously.."), Taylor, Justin, and Jake. It was great to shoot the breeze with them, but I remind you of the diarrhea problem.

Saturday morning me and Brian ate at our favorite Lawrence locality: Jeffersons. Then Brian bought 4 bags of Art & Mary's Jalepeno Chips and we drove back home to Nottingham Place.

For the rest of our day we hung out in my oh-so-cool room and shoot, went to Verizon Wireless. I got the bomb phone. It has voice recognition dialing, a speakerphone, color, flippage, and a happy owner. While I was programming my numbers, Brian was working on my devilish computer. And it died. It's not his fault. He got really mad because he loves computers more than the air he breathes. But I told him it's okay, maybe I can buy a new one!!

We went out for Pizza with Mom and Dad and Steph. Watched Saturday night live with Chesty McGee from Will & Grace as the host. Then we fell asleep and ate Goodcents for lunch the next day.

And then my favorite part of the weekend, and actually my whole existence.. We went shopping for wedding and engagement rings. Good God. I put one of those on my finger and I just about dropped down on my own knee to propose to myself. It was way fun. I picked out what I liked, Brian took some notes, and we were off like that.

Tonight I'm gonna watch Lost in Translation. I saw Under the Tuscan Sun yesterday and I just loved it. Maybe I'll buy it. I.. I don't know if I'll have time. I also played a lot of Barbies with my cousin's little 3 year old daughter. Mostly Gymnastical Barbies..

Ok people, I can't stay on this thing all bloody day.
I've gotta get my juicy, juicy mangos home.

2/06/2004

It's f'ing snowing again. Now don't get me wrong. I love snow more than sunshine, but when it keeps me from seeing the love of my lipe, I think it's just the most worst thing in the world. But what I guess it does provide, is for funny conversations with EPP people:

Beth = (a short-haired lass who advises every Primedia Employee to,
"GET OUT OF GRAPHICS NOW!" and always threatens to leave work
and live her life on her Organic Farm. Oh, and she's also an avid Chiefs fan.)

Jenn: "What I wanna know is where is all this snowing coming from?"
Beth: "HELL."

I thought that was hilarious.

2/05/2004

It's snowing a lot out there. It's very disheartening to go to work when the whole city is off, but you still have to drive to work is the snow, snow, snow. I had a little freak attack in my cube yesterday. But I'm better now. You know why? Because I went to Target to buy two things that make me a very happy gal. The first one being an envelope holder/separator for my desk at home. Call me president of the gay club, but I put all of my important "to do" tasks in there. And it makes me feel cool. The second happiness item being a 12-pack of diet Sunkist. It's my new favorite thing. I'll drink one every day, so there. Oh yeah, I also purchased the new Incubus CD on Tuesday. It's okay, not as good as S.C.I.E.N.C.E. Actually, I don't care what Brandon Boyd sounds like, just as long as he comes into my cube at around 11:30am today, tells me I don't need to ever work in a cubicle again and flies me to his house in California where we make 17 million babies.
Just kidding. I love you Brian.

2/03/2004

THANK YOU,

for finally letting me get the March issue out!
Now I'm going home to treat myself to a little pot roast.
sick.

Ok, yesterday I stayed at work until 7:30 pm. You know you've stayed too late at work when the UPS man leaves before you and you say good night to him. I went home and it was like time for bed. I went to brush my teeth and I swear I was this close to putting the toothpaste on my hairbrush. Not good. Today must be better.

2/02/2004

First of all.. I must say the hugest thanks ever to my best pal Court Campbell:
for setting me up with wireless internet in my freaking room.
Court, you are the lady of the land.
Moving on. This weekend was a blow because they said we'd get like 654,684,435,467 inches of snow and we ended up getting like one flake. So it wrecked everybody's plans. And Brian was stuck in Omaha, where they actually get real snow. I did nothing eventful this weekend. Ate a good salad with Jenny and Kelly, saw Win a Date with Tad Hamilton, painted a frame (oooh. very crafty), and ran the 'ol treadmill once. I can't even remember if I got out of my pajamas to run on the treadmill.
Oh, and at one point in the weekend, my dad ran upstairs to my room, literally ran, laughing, to show me this company pamphlet of his where there was a profile all about this woman named "Crystal Ball". He thought that was just the greatest thing.
So, now it's Monday.. Today at work I ship the March issue. And that's always a treat of a day. This morning I started to get sick of having my usual baggie of wheat thins. This is not a good sign. And I'm also wearing that black sweater that apparently makes my hair fall out all over it. Hooray for today.

2/01/2004

Ok. Just got done watching the superbowl. I don't quite know how I feel about this.
All I know is that Dad raised his eyebrows, Mom yelled out, "Nipple!"
and I went up stairs after that.

"With that, Timberlake reached across Jackson's leather gladiator outfit and pulled off the covering to her right breast, which was partially obscured by a sun-shaped, metal nipple decoration."
-Espn.com
Ahhhh!!! Hahahahaha!!!