11/30/2004

oh heaven's to mergatroid. It's pouring snow and I just polished off a Silver Spoon Cappachino with WHIPPED CREAM.

I'm a SOLDIER. I am obsessed with this, my new jam, Destiny's Child's Soldier song. Seriously, I'm like brushing my shoulders off in my cube, preparing myself for the moment when they might call and ask me to be the 4th Child. Let's just say my status is hood and I'm street.

Well, Thanksgiving was perfect. I flew up to the Lou and boy are my arms tired. No, but seriously, we relaxed in Brian's parents new mansion. Right on the front lawn of former Quarterback Kurt Warner. You know, we didn't really do a lot.. I did frequent the brand new and always popular, Crate and Barrel. I mean, great deals, valet parking, and Gingerbread in the parking garage? Come on. Pinch me. I watched The Terminal and Stepford Wives, and tried to pry Brian away from the blasted Tech TV. I ate a lot of Sourdough and saw a portly boy propose to his girl in the corner of a PF Changs. Complete with a Teddy Bear. Oh, I would love to move to St. Lou.

Sorry I haven't been blogging lately. I feel unimportant and like not very exciting. So I'll buck up and get back in the game with the Roly on my wrist. Woah, sorry. Now I'm listening to that Snoop/N.E.R.D. song where they go Snooooooooop. Life just doesn't get any better.
Thank you to Court for making my year and supplying me with the tunes.

I'm taking Friday off and I'm heading up to the town of Omaha. I'm on a mission by myself on Friday. Gonna buy a real Christmas tree for babe, even some holly for the mantle, and some stockings for the new holders I bought at Crate & Barrel, oops. Then there is a work Christmas party on Saturday.
Great, because I am harvesting zits from the zit farm on my face. Seriously.

Shout out to Sister Laura "TEETH" Hall. I accidentally saw those molars when I was trying to find stamps above the kitchen desk. Congrats Laura, you know how to grow 'em.
But seriously, sponge bath requests to the Dr? Have some class.

Well last night I bought the coveted Yankee Christmas Tree smelling candle. Mom had her usual comments of it smelling horrid, and I literally taped my face to the glass container and sniffed it all night. Tonight I'm going to get personal with my Save the Date cards, and also put those cool alpine flannel sheets on my bed, sweet bed.

I'm back babies.

11/23/2004

Greetings.

Well, I leave for St. Louis tonight. Right after work. Bless my heart, I'm a little nervous.

Steph's gone from the Pri and remember so is Melissa, so I have no one. I'm a lot sad. Now, I don't have any funny/multiple emails to delete from my "Sent" folder. Now I just write to clients, one right after the next. Man. It's depressing. Steph, I need to hear how this Job is.
Because I'm thinking about living in the grand piano in the Union.

This weekend, I would like to entitle, "Wedding Hell". I saw Alfie on Friday night. It was great, because as the sex scenes rolled in, I had my 18 year old sister on one side of me and a sleeping Brian on the other side of me. Let's just say I would definitely have two husbands if Jude Law asked me to. Come to Mama.

On Saturday, we woke up at an insane our and drove to Brookside to visit a florist that we ended up spending 2 hours with and during that whole time I could not understand a word she was saying. So that basically made me cross her off the list. And I don't think Brian thought he was going to get such an education in floral arrangement. What a sport. Then we grabbed bagels, I bought my wedding shoes (gee!) and we high-tailed it down to the Plaza for a 3:00 meeting to see the Reception area that Brian or Mom hadn't see before. They loved every part of it, I got really excited, and then we headed over to Invitation Nation (Paper Source) to nail down some invitations. After that meeting, we decided to go to Kona Grill to celebrate our 3 year anniversary. We sat down, ordered some drinks and noticed that if you didn't like sushi, they served puke. So, we got an appetizer and went off to do some shopping. At Banana Republic, Brian bought two nice shirts after being harassed by Farnsworth Bentley the salesman. Then every restaurant had a 2 hour wait. So we got some margs and ate at Baja 600.
I think I shopped Brian's brains out. Yes. Yes, I did.

So I just got back from a lunch, in honor and thanking this lady that watched my desk for 3 days whilst I was on jury duty. We celebrated her for like an hour and a half.
Two things happened to me while at this dainty french restaurant:
1.) I ate some broiled chicken with this cream sauce and vegetables. Only, I couldn't find the damn grain in the chicken. You know.. to cut easily. I think I must have murdered it trying to find the way to break it into pieces and it was a little tough anyway. I'm sure I looked high class. Thank God for the french bread.
2.) The damn cream sauce made me so thirsty because apparently it was peppercorn. So I went for my water goblet (yes) and I tilted it up to drink, and nothing came into my mouth, so I waited, and all of the sudden all the ice came down on my face and the water behind it flowed down my shirt. I think the rest of the ladies did that thing where they really saw all of what just happened, but they pretended they didn't see all of what just happened. WHY ME.

Went to the Chiefs game last night. Dad got seriously out of control. Screaming at the top of his little lungs trying to get drunk people to sit down so he could see the halftime marching band show.
Too much? Yes. Embarrassed? Slightly.

11/17/2004

Hiya, gotta post!
I didn't do a little clip art magic turkey head deal, or piss my "panties" AHHHHHHHHHH!!!, I didn't go to the Big Sleazy, and I'm surely not sleeping with a baby's daddy. But I am listening to Meatloaf's "I would do anything for Love" (tasty hi hat) song. And I did try on my real, wedding dress today. It's in. And I'm more pumped than a pair of early 90's Reebocks. I feel like some movie stars and heaven combined. Little Ida helped me buy a veil and headpiece too. I also found like the swellest bridesmaid dress ever. Oh, I've basically changed my freaking mind like over and over. But baby, it's gonna be floor length, strapless, and a plum-smoke-grey-latte color. And the flowers are going to be wine colored, reds, purples, deep colors with touches of white and green and black berries and crap like that. I am so excited that I have finally made a decision for once in my natural life. And I'll shout it from the roof tops, by God.

Last night I went to my first floral appointment. I was testing her out to see if she was usable. Ok, first I pulled up to a house that, like I told Steph, I literally wanted to run up to the brick walls with a spoon and eat it because it was so damn cute. Pottery Barnish, but simple.. not like she's all about the Benjamin's, but man I instantly wanted to be her best friend. She was 28 and looked like the Father of The Bride Movie-girl character. Cute as a button/whip. I just love her. I got a great feeling about her style so I'm all pumped up. Who wants to touch me.

Sing with me Kimmy. Classic Loaf:
Will you hold me sacred will you hold me tight?
Can you colorize my life, I'm so sick of black and white!
I can do that..
Can you make some magic with my own to hands?
Can you make an emerald city with these grains of sand?
Can you give me something i can taaaaaake home?
I can do that. No No, now I can do that.
Can you cater to every fantasy I got?
WILL YOU HOSE ME DOWN WITH HOLY WATER, IF I GET TOO HOT?

Did anyone happen to catch Laguna Beotch? Holy crap. Nobody told me that Christina's Minister father holds church in the middle of Epcot Center. I mean come on. And since when did camping mean that you take a million dollar yacht in order to get to the camp site. Laguna Beach, next week graduation.. tomorrow, the world.

11/15/2004

I feel like ralphing all over Primedia Business. I don't know why but I woke up feeling pukish. Last night I thought it would be important to stay up until 2:30 am looking at theknot.com. Sweet Jesus, I think it gave me an ulcer. But I did get ideas on how to make tissue pockets for people who cry, how to contact the company to put my picture on a postage stamp, and how to post a question and have a jillion crazy bride people write back to me. It's great.

This weekend was the best. I went up to Husker Nation on Thursday night, grabbed the golden arches, and went to Brian's where him and Ian were waiting to go to the New Found Glory Concert. We hopped in Ian's massive truck, and in no time were cranking the new B. Spears greatest hits. The concert was pretty much the bomb. We started out in the back and pretty soon, made it up to the second row. It was sweaty and it was great. I kept telling boys to put their shirts back on because i didn't appreciate their nasty sweaty selves touching me. They were 14, I didn't care. I was doing so well, until about the second to last song. Some huge man came moshing up behind me, Brian/I didn't see him, and he landed square on my head. Fatso was the hammer, my head was the nail, and my neck went into my body. I ran out of the crowd screaming and crying. I was cool. You know, sometimes you're the pigeon and sometimes you're the statue. Running back to our car in -20 degree weather, I sprained my ankle.

On Friday, Brian and I purchased a new mirror for the dining room cubby area. It looks so awes. I also bought a few gifts from the Afternoon. Montie, Liz, and J-Rod came up that night. We bought a 20$ pizza and prepared for a night of fun down on the streets of Old Market. Let's just say a good night was had by all. I saw some old friends and some new pubs. Brian even met a new friend when a guy pulled down his pants at the bar and screamed, CRACK KILLS.

On Saturday we bummed around most of the day, ate some Culver's goodness, and then, went to a casino. Now, I have never ever been to one..and I will say that I'll never go back. Eww. It was stale, had trashy men wearing bandanas over their hair, people cashing their paychecks entirely to play slots, old granny ladies putting in the 100$ bills and betting 4 credits at a time, purse snatchers, leotard hooter girls, and idiots working 3 slots at once. I easily lost 20 dollars way to fast. I watched Brian and he became a spaz gambler, determined to break even. I think I saw the beginnings of a gambling addiction. That's when we left and all had dinner at our favorite and yours, Charlestons.

Sunday morning our pals took off and I watched a bit of the Chiefs game and Brian farted a lot.

11/11/2004

Get a Load of THIS.

oh jesusi.
I need plural jesuses.
Because my wedding is going to suck.

11/10/2004

It's a Starbucks morning, people. Hmm. Could I have a Starbucks coffee fountain at my wedding?
You can bet your bottom dollar that I'm renting that chocolate fountain I've been hearing about.
Hot Damn.

Last night I went to a Laguna Beach Viewing Party. Um, best decision of my life. First of all, I informed myself that I need to purchase the new Britney Spear's Greatest Hits Album IMMEDIATELY. How can I not. I will work out to Britney daily and it will make for an enjoyable car-ride/concert up to Omaha tomorrow. I heard that she took the cover picture two years ago because she hates the way she looks now. Let's just say B. Federline might have a smoking/flying in the private jet to get coffees/white trash problem now. Whatever, I'm still going to buy that CD and worship it.

So, let's talk Laguna Beach. I think I really appreciated that musical montage with all of the young lads asking their girls to prom. First off, is Kristin an idiot? Besides the fact that she talks like an F'ing retarded puppet, did she now know that Stephen was typing that stupid mystery letter? Come on. Second off, who did Lo take to prom? A baby lion? Jesus. And why was Trey skating everywhere? Skating to help howdy doody hang up a prom banner, skating home from prom, skating in his personally designed camo jacket with matching leather wristband and hat and T-shirt. IS STEPHEN BLIND? On the limo on the way home, Kristin was just talking on a phone that didn't even work (while the baby lion was barfing) and she basically told Stephen to buzz off after he goes to college.
Hello LC. Take him to the front of the Hummer limo and make some Laguna Beach babies.

Well, tonight me and Britney are running and I'm taking off for Omaha tomorrow because I'm taking off Friday. NFG on Thursday night, Old Market and an expensive taxi home on Friday night with Liz, Montie, and the Boys. SPREAD IT ON!

11/08/2004

Ah yes, a little night time blogging. I've got my new apple scented candle going, a hot bowl of mac and cheese spirals, and I just ate a package of airplane peanuts.

Well, this weekend was nice. Brian ate lunch with me on Friday, we ordered our pictures from Misty Woodward (www.mistywoodward.com, client login, 2061), and ate a nice family dinner, where in which I did proceed to set the olympic record in freestyle oriental salad eating individual event.
We watched a Yellowcard DVD and I basically fell asleep way too early.

On Saturday, we slept the heck in, and set off to find a mirror with a thick black wooden frame for the apartment. Well, no such luck, because apparently, they don't exist in THE WORLD. We also went to Town Center where I bought a lovely amount of clothes from our favorite and yours, the Gap. Two sweaters, one pink, one ivory, and a new pair of jeans that make me look dead sexy. Maybe. Wait. No.

I also dragged Brian to Noltes where we investigated the Bridesmaid dresses some more. I decided on floor length and pink, but then I received that hideous swatch, and I decided I'd rather not have that kind of a color in my wedding. Now I'm focusing on steel blue. But they also gave me the option of switching the fabric to satin, and doing latte or a misty pink. (The dress is originally organza)

Which brings me to Vote or Die 2004:
-misty rose pink
-steel blue and chocolate brown
-latte mocha color

God bless it, I can't decide.

Saturday night me and the Bri went out on a real double date with Mr. and Mrs. Jones-Coleman. It was like why I was born. We started out at the Elephant Bar and then went to see The Incredibles. Brian and Jas Face drank African Queens whilst Steph and I spoke of memories past.

Sunday was plaza day. We shopped in the beautiful weather, ate at the California Pizza Kitchen, and held hands as we sniffed the smell of horse in the air.

Work was kind of gay today. I can't wait because I'm taking off Friday and going to Omaha on Thursday night. Me, Brian, and Ian are going to see New Found Glory. My first Omaha concert.
A lot is at stake here, Omaha. Then Montie, Liz, Justin, and Big Sexy are coming up from Lawrence.

Ok, time to hit the showers and wish I went to bed way earlier.

11/05/2004

God Bless it, I need to blog. Or Josh will go crazy.

Honestly, nothing really cool is going on with me. Other than, if you put a red suit on me, I will look like Santa Claus. Does anyone want to be my workout partner and join my gym? Boy, that was a desperate cry for help. Shut up, Jenn. Um, my gum is stuck to my bottom back row of teeth. I can't get it out and i'm starting to get a little worried maybe. I keep adding pieces in hopes that they will lodge the mass loose. So far, I just have one massive ball of gum on the left side of my mouth.
Very business professional.

So I got my swatch yesterday of the color I picked out for the bridesmaid dresses. It looks like the color of the superbubble mass in my mouth. It's too much and it makes me want to projectile vomit. So I might be ordering some more swatches. Maybe brown? Maybe I'll just have the girls run down the isle naked. Shit.

Last night me and Tyler had the best night and watched Donald, the cobra (ssssssss..you're FIRED!)

I guess, for me, the highlight of the episode would be George's replacement, I believe his name was Michael. I believe walkie-talkie matermind Ben, put it best when he surfaced what should be the most obvious and greatest observation since the dawn of time.
A combination of Sadam Hussein and Tom Selleck.
Let's take a look for ourselves, shall we?

Now, I apologize from the bottom of my heart that this picture isn't more close up.
But you got to take what you can get, I suppose. I nearly barfed, I thought that was so clever.

The rest of the night, me and Tyler and Ben sat in the dark. We had planted two of Ben's walkie talkies, one in the mailbox by the front door and one in the tree by the side walk. We were going to scare the bejesus out of Sally, Ben's lover, but our plan was foiled, because Sally didn't feel like coming over. But Ben did scare some late night walkers with choice phrases such as, "I'm really looking forward to Superbowl 2005!" or "RECYCLING IS COOL". Ah, good old boys. I love them and their tudor.
I'd actually like to toot in their tudor.

Well, tonight I'm going to view my Misty pics, have family dinner, take some gay family Christmas photos in front of the same mantle for the past 15 years, and maybe start a small fire in your mom's panties.

11/03/2004

My boobs feel huge today. Wait, no. that's everyday.
Note to self, never accidentally wear the push up Vicky's bra into the workplace. Titty City.

Well, i'm overjoyed.
Bush won, Laura and big Denn keep their jobs, and those ads will stop playing on my TV.
And really, this is all I have left to say:


Tonight, the pro-fisherman bachelor, a panini sandwich, some rain,
and big Brian Scott are on the ballot for tonight.

11/02/2004

I voted at 6:05 am this morning people!

I think this day is very exciting. I was a titch nervous, but I pulled that lever baby. I thought I would be slick and just roll out of bed and put on some decent clothes and walk through the backyard to Oxford to vote, no makeup, crusty eyes, and real cool breath probably. Yeah, so HELLO NEIGHBORHOOD. Laura, I even gave Jah Hall a high-five! Which, I don't know, he quite possibly could have been just waving, but I was so groggy, that I took it as an immediate opportunity to give the man some five.

The line to vote was all snakey and whatnot and this small man walks in the door and asked people where the end was. And it was behind me, and he walks up to me and says, "excuse me" like he wants to get by me. Like, what did he think I was doing? Standing there for my health? I was in line, buddy, and the line was behind me, short man. Cripes.

Anyway, it was great, and now I am proudly wearing my sticker that I assume will become quite fashionable. I think it's funny, because on VH1's best week ever, the top five reasons to vote were all: "So Puff Daddy won't kill you."

Yesterday I had some of mom's spicy turkey meatballs, which required me to drink the ocean, which required me to go to the gym, which then in turn required me to eat a small Mr. Goodbar.

11:30, Chipolte/free burrito of goodness in my mouth, here I come.